I don’t know when her memory started to lapse. It came slowly. I just can’t seem to remember anything she would tell me. Sometimes I can’t remember when you were little. Then one day recently she called and left me a voice message.
There wasn’t anything odd to her voice to start with. Then she said I’ve been thinking. I’ve been thinking about you all day and how I treated you when you were growing up. I’m so sorry. I should have been a better Mother to you. There are so many things I should have done better. I’m so sorry.
I don’t know why our mind only remembers or focuses on what we think are mistakes. I quickly called Momma to remind her of all the wonderful things she did for me. Then I realized she might forget. In this modern world of emails, and texts, and Facebook, and Twitter we’ve lost something. Something very valuable. We can go back and re-read a letter, look at the underlined words in red. Feel the bumps where tears dried. Smell the hint of perfume from long ago. Yes there is something very valuable about taking your time to write from the heart.
So I’m gonna write a letter to Momma. I have a great memory from my childhood to write about. My Momma was very involved in the PTA. For a fundraiser, Walnut Park Elementary had a Football Queen contest. The winner was chosen by whoever raised the most money - one penny at a time. My Mom made the sash for the winner. It was gold velvet ribbon with blue glitter letters. I thought it was the prettiest thing I had ever seen. We put my picture on mason jars and put them all over town hoping I would win. And I did. I have misplaced a lot of stuff. I’ve lost all sorts of “favorite” jewelry, my letter sweater, and designer gowns. But I still have my Football Queen sash safely tucked away.
I thought about that sash tonight when I was making the sash for my Brownie Girl Scout troop. They are going to receive their try-it patches tomorrow night and I wanted to make something special that their Dad’s could pin on their vest.
I’m gonna write about that too – in my letter to Momma. Happy Mother’s Day all you Momma’s out there.
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